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'13​/​Calvinball

by Patrick Scott Barry

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1.
Blush 05:19
Gazing at me from your glass chambers You'll never cast the stone Richly clad you stay so cold, but You always warm my bones One taste of your intoxication Asphyxiation ensues Cuz darlin, from my cell you bring liberation Which at this point, I cannot refuse Can't put trust in no more liars Feeling guilt for my desires Make me blush, take me higher Little hands squeeze capillaries Forcing rosy hues Make your way down to my stomach Do with me as you choose Sugar, you stain my brain Drove me insane, against my grain Yet from my hell you bring salvation Which at this point, I cannot refrain Can't put trust in no more liars Feeling guilt for my desires Make me blush, take me higher
2.
Mirage 05:49
Tapping into the drought Siphoning sun-bleached sand Sweating through the hours As dust cakes on my hands These deathly lulls They gently Pull my eyes to the back of my skull And in your omnipresent light I let my soul evaporate Oh would you keep it warm for me Or would you let it incinerate? Toxic rays beam down Yeah I'll taste it down my throat Taking the rain away Taking the pain away These deathly lulls They gently Pull my eyes to the back of my skull And in your omnipresent light I let my soul evaporate Oh would you keep it warm for me Or would you let it incinerate?
3.
<...>
4.
Deep in this water I'm bound to fate Followed my nose as it lead me to her Despite my instincts, this would not wait Buried my nose as I slowly become her I'm learning to love hating myself Dearest friend, familiar touch Flirting with razors down her feeble arms The price you pay for showing too much We play this game under cover of night Our depraved lust, entrusted to us Safety words written in milligram tabs Showing true love in the lines of dust I'm giving this doubt the credit she's earned Murdering my foolish dreams Lost in the hope this dusty trail Resurrects them, or so it seems
5.
<...>
6.
Teeth Dreams 06:02
And you still haunt me in my teeth dreams I can't deny these words that sleep tell me It holds the truth, the one I've held so dear That fear of light from which you save me Just clear a path And do the math, I needed one Bite at my rawest nerves 'Cause I deserve her harsh lesson She knows by baser needs Will supersede my lucidity So just declaw me I'll withdraw the forces driving me And when do these dreams take on lives of their own? Because my skulls rejecting what took years to grow Dark tunnels in my mouth will echo from my youth As she proceeds to pull the final wisdom tooth Your words are harrowing And narrowing my wits A stitch in time would save you From the grave, so give up this shit Suspending disbelief Might bring relief beneath the drink Knowing she'll break the surface tension Worsens whatever I may think And when do these dreams take on lives of their own? Because my skulls rejecting what took years to grow Dark tunnels in my mouth will echo from my youth As she proceeds to pull the final wisdom tooth 'Cause you still haunt me in my teeth dreams I can't deny these words that sleep tell me It holds the truth, the one I've held so dear That fear of light from which you save me That fear of light from which you save me The very fear that still plagues me The fucked-up dreams that you gave me
7.
Trauma Doll 06:04
Found you in my car White as the purest fear Artifact from lost reverie last night As incandescent flames burned A valiant on my part Kept you hidden from my sight Down at the watering hole Got sucked into the strid again She took a chance to breathe life into my heart Onset like tramadol Existential knots untie A plane which we will zealously depart The song she sung in ancient tongues Trickle out her fragile lungs And I would learn her sweet nocturne An ultraviolet sonic burn My friends, the tables have turned She sought out every wound And asked of me, "Where does it hurt? As long as I am here, the point is moot" That's when this sunk in This quietist priestess quietly pieced together The quiet peace of which I've been in long pursuit Her lullaby, now dull and dry Selfish pangs keep asking "why?" Still I yearn for her nocturne Though at the point of no return My friends, the tables have turned As anchors bind, and cankers grind I quickly return to a world unkind She never meant to quit on this note But that's all she wrote
8.
9.
10.

about

originally released as "Luca" by Calvinball (Boston) in 2013

credits

released December 21, 2013

PSB13/CALVINBALL

All songs written & performed by Patrick Scott Barry
Tracks 1-7 engineered, produced, and mastered by Joel Simches
Tracks 8-10 engineered, produced, and mastered by Patrick Scott Barry

Tracks 1-7 recorded at Watch City Studios Waltham, MA April 2012-August 2013
Tracks 8-10 recorded at Patrick's mom's house Norwood, MA November-December 2013

additional backing vocals on "Blush" provided by Richard Lane
mellotron on "Reveries in F" provided by Joel Simches

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about

Patrick Scott Barry Lancaster, South Carolina

PSB makin some m

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